Recently, I came across a trend where an acclaimed relationship expert on Facebook, Shamseddin Giwa asked married people a controversial question which is “If you had a chance to do it all over, what mistake would you avoid in marriage?”

After seeing this, I rushed to the comment section to see people’s replies. As an optimistic being, I was expecting positive comments but I was disappointed because the replies I saw were not encouraging especially for singles like us.

They say marriage is not a bed of roses but it shouldn’t be worse. Nevertheless, I was eager to see what people have to change about their marriage, and with a cold glass of water, I started scrolling.

I scrolled to the last, signing every minute and taking deep breaths because I realized the majority of the comments belonged to the women, and they centered on “SOURCE OF INCOME” Almost all the women regretted not having their own money before they got married.

One woman said “Not having my source of income before getting married, that is my biggest regret”

Another woman also said “To be a woman with her own money before marriage” This woman coupled her comment with a sad emoji.

It goes on and on like that. All shouting “Source of income.”

While believing social media is detrimental to healthy living, one cannot turn a blind eye to a very important issue like this which is “women having a Source of income before marriage”

Over the years it is a common belief or mentality that has been incorporated into our mentality that women end all their struggles in the kitchen. Despite civilization and technology some parts of Nigeria or the world at large still believe women are inferior and don’t hold the key post, this also affects us religiously.

As a result, females are being pushed to an early marriage without an achievement, without fulfilling purpose, without anything to be proud of, and with nothing, such women are left at the mercy of their husbands. Their husbands provide everything, to decision-making, and these women contribute nothing than giving birth and taking care of the home.

Reverend Funke Felix Adejumo while coaching on marriage said it is wrong to say finding your partner will make you complete, you have to be complete on your own. In short, marriage does not make you complete.

Being complete as a woman boils down to a personal journey that can encompass various aspects of life, such as self-discovery, self-acceptance, pursuing passions, maintaining meaningful relationships, and achieving personal goals. It’s about embracing your individuality, finding balance, and living authentically in a way that aligns with your values and aspirations.

So I surveyed by asking five men this question, “Can you marry a lady without any source of income?”

Here are their replies:

Victor Omolana: The answer is NO
Gone are those days when a saying that said “Women’s Career ends in the kitchen “See we are in the 21st century where even kids fetch for themselves why would I marry a liability at home Besides the current dispensation of this country doesn’t support man during it alone practically no matter the level of our income. Women are supporters, not a liability.

Abbas Babajide: Sure, she can be empowered by the man to do business or help in getting paid employment.
That’s why courtship is important to know ourselves in-depth. Once am sure she’s not lazy and she’s eager to be a beta person den marriage is sure.

Joshua Ajoge: Yes I can marry such, if and only she agrees to find a job, and learn a skill (if she doesn’t have any) to have a means of income.

I asked further “What if she insists on not doing anything?”

Ajoge said: “I won’t accept that”

Oluwafemi: Certainly, in the present world, it’s not feasible for us to marry a woman without a job or any source of income, as the desire for gender equality has risen significantly. Women aspire to have financial independence, and the current state of the economy, with its high costs, reinforces the need for multiple sources of income.

Having money before getting married is important for women. Here are five reasons why:

Independence: It helps them be self-reliant and make their own decisions.

Financial Security: They can contribute to the family’s finances and be prepared for emergencies.

Equal Partnership: Both partners can share responsibilities and contribute to the household.

Career Goals: They can continue pursuing their career dreams and ambitions.

Personal Growth: It allows them to develop skills and confidence outside of marriage.

In conclusion:

Although men are expected to bear the responsibilities of the household, a man who cannot provide for his home financially should never enter into matrimony. Just as it is crucial for the man to fulfill this duty, it is imperative for the woman to possess a source of income to assume the role of financial supporter to her husband. Therefore, Ladies, get your own money.